Flashing Personality

A remarkable discovery has been revealed from a ten month long investigation into cars and personalities. The speed of a car’s indicators reflects the personality of the owner.

“We have found that the rate of flash is proportional to the impulsiveness of the driver. More cautious drivers tend to have a slower flash rate,” says Freda Ghert, Lead Officer of the study at Long Beach Market Research.

In a bid to see what motivates customers to buy certain cars, Freda and her team have been probing in the psyche of vehicle owners and pairing the data with facts about their car.

“If I were a salesman, I’d look very carefully at the results of this study. Many of the findings are intuitive, many more are not,” she says, “The indicator speed is not the only correlation discovered, but it certainly is up there with the most surprising.”

Long Beach Market Research is looking to apply their new knowledge to develop an app to quickly determine the likely type of car a customer may want to purchase.ChesterLogoSmall

Cloud Tumours

Cosmic Radiation is the cause for tumours within clouds, says leading meteorological expert Sam Skediva.

The cysts are formed when vapour molecules within the clouds are struck by cosmic radiation, high energy protons and nuclei that come from the solar system. Using scanning radio telescopes, Skediva and his team have demonstrated that clouds act as a sacrificial barrier to the harmful radiation.

“The tumours you see are a result of the fantastically high energy of the incident radiation. Vapour molecules collect around the trail of the decaying particles, in a similar fashion to a cloud chamber, but what we find extraordinary is that the residual traces ‘grow’ to form a cyst,” he says, “Although some of the cysts do grow, and can eventually grow so large as to disrupt the functioning of the cloud, there is no solid evidence for alarm. This happens on a daily basis as clouds are formed and unformed and reformed.”

More likely than not, the rate of extinction of clouds is more than enough to mitigate any ill effects.”Most of these are what you might call ‘benign’, and those that are ‘malignant’ don’t hang around for long enough to cause any lasting effects.”ChesterLogoSmall