Global Warming Linked to Earthquakes

A team of Japanese seismologists and meteorologists have joined efforts to determine whether ambient temperature fluctuations have a bearing upon tectonic activity.

“It came as a surprise. We decided to compare [data from separate studies] on a whim, just to see if there was any link,” says Professor Yamato, Head Meteorologist in the study, “There is no direct correlation, not in a perfect sense, however we did see that the patterns of environmental fluctuations were followed, after the order of several years, by deviations in tectonic activity.”

In layman’s terms, it appears that there is a 14 or 15 year shift between extreme temperatures on the Earth’s crust manifesting and subsequent tectonic activities. Extreme cold and hot years cause a rippling effect, a contraction and expansion on a global scale, that disrupts the motion of tectonic plates.

“Think of it like metal fatigue. Thermal fluctuations cause ultra-long scale oscillations. Rapid expansion and contraction, and when I say rapid, I am talking about the order of years in this case, can loosen the macroscopic bonds, freeing up plates so that they move more easily.”

Professor Hiro, Head Seismologist, is more cautious when it comes to the claims.

“I will not accept that a hot spell ’causes’ earthquakes,” he says, “For that would be going too far. I will [accept that] there is a distinct and uncanny correlation between the two if we perform the time shift.”

He states that the Earth has a natural, complex cycle and that while his team’s research is potentially revolutionary, causality cannot be established with any confidence given the current research.

“More research is required, specialised and particular, and it will take many more years, I am afraid. I would hesitate to jump to any conclusions.”

An application for further research is expected to be submitted in the coming months.ChesterLogoSmall

Man, it’s hot today!

“It wouldn’t be so bit if it were a dry heat. It’s the humidity that does it.”

The only thing more annoying than a rhetorical complaint is an unwarranted response according to Social Ventures researcher, Jackie Marzden. While designing a new ‘annoy-o-meter’ for their social science research, they developed a system to test it, and came up with various scenarios that people find annoying.

“It’s very difficult to quantify how annoying someone or something is. Quite often the results are skewed depending on the environment, context, people and situations. For example, someone clicking their nails abstractedly might not bother someone on any other day but, given that they recently gave up smoking, their response can be overwhelming,” she says, “The scale is logarithmic in nature, which comes as no surprise. The real challenge lies in getting test subjects to feel annoyance.”

Jackie says that social niceties and politeness masks the true level of irritation a person feels. To mitigate these factors, her team lets the participants score their annoyance anonymously. The early results are interesting.

“The overall level of irritation is like a leaky bucket. The more refreshed, relaxed and comfortable a person is, the holes are in the bucket to allow irritation to dissapate. If someone is sleep deprived, undergoing major stresses or in an unfamiliar environment, their irritability increases exponentially, despite what their outward disposition is like.”

More than this, her team showed that annoying factors have a compounding effect and that ‘irritant-combos’ are exponentially more effective at annoying a subject than any single source of irritation.

Jackie explains, “We found that even the most severe irritants, such as being sneezed upon, scored a less than a combination of lesser irritants. For example and unhelpful complaint, such as those about the weather, scored about a 1 on our ire-scale, while an unhelpful response to that complaint drew an ire of 3, which is 100 times more annoying than the original irritation.”ChesterLogoSmall